Writing always makes me feel happy and worthful . Writing stories lights up my world like nothing else does. Being an introvert I have always loved exploring the world and reflecting that on a paper. I have dreamt of becoming famous as an author or working in a newspaper agency as a writer or an editor or doing a job in a company where I would contribute my ideas for advertisements.
But then, I think life has something else planned for me. The moment you score good marks or marks that are ‘not bad’, you are obligated to do what others think.This is what that changes everything.
Being a student of Arts, I often become prey to the question, “When are you planning to write the civil service examination?”. Even when my parents are ready to let me follow my desires, there are some who are eagerly waiting for the day I crack India’s most prestigious exam. However, they don’t realize that, that is not what I want.
Why does this happen?
This is not novel. Even my almost forty five year old teacher said about her experience as to how she had to try hard not to be pushed by others. I have to say her experience was quite bitter. With her high marks she was often stamped as a future IAS officer. While she wanted to pursue higher studies in history, she had to face a lot of harsh comments and rejections. Yet she managed to reach her goal. She stood strong and followed her dream. She is a determined lady. I am afraid I can’t do it.
What kind of pleasure do they get from simply pushing a young soul to do what it never wants? Do they need to see us suffer? Do they need to see how we go mad and then give up everything as we lose our will to live?
Most of the people see money equal to social status. The higher your salary is, the higher will be the respect you get from the society. If you are an officer, you get good treatment from others . If you are a clerk you are not heeded by anyone. Even India’s most used rule, ‘Atithi Devo bhava’ gets influenced by this prejudicial mentality. Forever, equality is at stake.
Especially for a girl, it is very hard. She ought to achieve everything that others want within a limited time. Otherwise she will be forced to marry a man who will see her as a burden as she has no job. What about her dreams? Won’t she, like any other person be having a passion for designing, the strong desire to lead a group of people, a wish to become an artist, an urge to make the world know about her creative stories through her writings? The list goes on…Women are helpless and many such dreams go buried deep under her married life.
So a girl like me is not even given enough time to realise her dream and pursue it. I am afraid that by the time I fulfill others’ dreams I will run out of time and be forced to live a life that I never wanted. I am afraid that my desire to be a writer will never be achieved.
What it leads to?
The rate of suicides in India is not that bad. A good portion of it belongs to the young generation who have given up on their lives due to the immense pressure they had from their parents, relatives, teachers and even neighbours. They are constantly asked about their future , sent to coaching centres, where their parents spend a huge chunk of money and if they end up reaching nowhere, they feel worthless that they think giving up life is the better choice than going through any more of this.
Each person has their own passion, talents and dreams. Everyone can’t be the same. Speaking might be ones’s strength while writing might be another’s. One can remember so many things while another can come up with pun quotes. Suffocating a person by giving him or her unbearable burden will only ruin lives.
Now , I doubt whether gaining excellent marks in 10th and 12th was a good thing for me because if I had never caught anyone’s attention through these marks I might have had the space to follow my dreams and become what I want one day.